Like most of you, I’m celebrating the birth of the newest little prince; Master Archie Harrison Mountbatten Windsor (could there be a better name?!) There’s something about a new baby that not only brings joy and excitement, but also warms the heart as we watch the beginning of a family unfold.
While I’m sure some of you were waiting to see that brand new button nose, most of you had your eyes on his Mommy. This elegant, classy woman who captured the hearts of all mother’s everywhere as she confidently yet exhaustedly walked down that long hall-way, 2 days post the birth of her first son, expected to make a press call and introduce her little piece of heaven to the world.
What we couldn’t help but notice was Meghan’s realness. That extra gate in her walk that only a Mom walking 2 days after birth understands, the exhaustion you feel while still perfectly at peace, because in those first moments of your brand new baby – all is right in the world. But more than that, we noticed that neatly tied belt accentuating the tummy that held this precious babe only 48 hours before.
Perhaps you’re asking yourselves why there was so much press regarding the outfit she chose and I can tell you in three little words. This. is. postpartum. In a world where our magazine covers flaunt brand new babies on the chests of their perfectly thin and toned mommies, Meghan walked out showing what a typical postpartum mother looks like. And I laugh a little because she still makes giving birth two days ago look easy as she dons a perfectly pressed dress with full makeup and hair. But, behind the obligatory dress, her body – the extra little bit of puffiness that comes with giving birth, the tired eyes and stretched out womb – were there to be seen by the world, and she showed it off gracefully and with confidence.
Our society makes it really hard for new moms. You’re allowed a few days to enjoy this little piece of your heart that’s now walking outside of your body, but after that? You’re constantly reminded that you’re not how you once were. Your skin has stretched. Your waistline is scattered with rigid stripes. The weight that was acceptable while carrying your baby has suddenly become a point of shame and the eagerness to get back to your “pre-baby weight” is thrust upon you as you open your closet and find your maternity wear uncomfortable and baggy, while all of your regular clothes can’t be pulled up past your knees. It’s frustrating.
I’ve been there. In fact, as I searched through tens of thousands of pictures over the last 5 years of having my boys, I was hard pressed to find a full body photo of myself in the months after giving birth. Why? Because I made sure to hide. Hide behind baggy clothes. Hide behind my babies. Or simply hide from the camera. I was ashamed of the weight I had gained and the way that I looked. I knew in my heart that my body was incredible and had literally given life to three perfectly healthy, strong little boys, and yet my mind told me that was not good enough because I didn’t look like I used to. Because I didn’t measure up to society’s expectations of what a new Mom should be. Because it took me two years to get back comfortably into my trusty pair of jeans, and even then they don’t fit the same way. I’ll always have those stripes below my belly button and sneakily twisting up the muffin top I never used to have.
Perhaps it’s the industry I am from. Perhaps it’s because at my very first baby shower, a woman who I trusted and looked up to in my field asked how much weight I had gained. But, my sneaking suspicion is that regardless of what you do; regardless of who you are, having babies and being comfortable with your new body is not an overnight process. It’s hard. And that’s okay.
Mama, be easy on yourself.
I know that is easier said than done, but as I looked back on those thousands of photos today, yes, I saw a tired Mom. I saw a puffy face, bloated breasts and a tummy that was extra jiggly. But more than that? I saw a warrior. I saw a woman who battled some pretty tough pregnancy’s, sacrificed more than she ever thought possible and was so in love with the babies she had just birthed. I saw a Mom whose time during those sweet babyhood years were marred by caring TOO MUCH about the way she looked and worried about how other people thought. Because deep down, those few extra pounds are absolutely NOTHING in comparison to bringing life into this world.
You are enough.
You are beautiful.
You can walk confidently knowing that your body is strong and beautiful and that you are courageous for loving yourself exactly as you are.
So, thank you, Meghan, for showing Mom’s everywhere that they are beautiful in this sacred moment. That the ‘extra’ is simply an outward symbol of the extra love and sacrifice that comes with becoming a Mom.
STYLISHANDSTRONG 